The topic of whether a wife should submit to her husband is a complex and nuanced one that requires careful examination of Scripture. At a surface level reading, there are verses that seem to indicate that wives should submit to their husbands (Ephesians 5:22-24, Colossians 3:18, 1 Peter 3:1). However, looking at the full counsel of Scripture reveals that the Bible promotes mutual submission between husbands and wives out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21).
In Ephesians 5:22-24, the passage starts with verse 21 which calls for all believers to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” This mutual submission provides the context and reason for the passage on wives submitting to husbands that follows. Wives are instructed to submit to their husbands “as to the Lord” because husbands are called to sacrificially love their wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25). This passage promotes a mutual submission between husbands and wives, not a one-sided hierarchical relationship.
The instruction for wives to submit to their husbands should be understood within the cultural context of the 1st century Greco-Roman world where patriarchy and female subordination was the norm. The call for mutual submission between Christian husbands and wives was very counter-cultural at the time. In a sense, the instructions served as a limiting force, constraining the authority of the husband for the benefit of the wife.
Colossians 3:18-19 also addresses marital relationships, stating “Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.” Again the passage pairs the wife’s submission with the husband’s call to sacrificial love and warns against harsh treatment. This reciprocation indicates mutual respect and care, not unilateral authority.
1 Peter 3:1-7 provides guidance for Christian wives with non-Christian husbands. Wives are instructed to submit and win their husbands over through their pure and respectful behavior rather than nagging or preaching. This is motivated by the hope that the husbands may become Christians as well by observing their wives’ gentle conduct. The emphasis is on modeling Christ through one’s actions more than demanding submission.
Looking at Scripture holistically, the concept of submission appears in many contexts, not just regarding wives. Believers are called to submit to governing authorities (Romans 13:1, 1 Peter 2:13-17), church leaders (Hebrews 13:17), and one another (Ephesians 5:21). The common thread is voluntarily yielding to others out of reverence for Christ without any implication of inferiority. The Bible makes it clear that men and women are equal before God as persons and in their value (Galatians 3:28).
The instructions for wives to submit to their husbands reflect cultural norms of the time period that are not necessarily universally applicable today. The mutual submission described in Scripture appears to be more of a voluntary yielding or deferring at times, not a mandated obedience. Nowhere does the Bible condone abuse or dominance by husbands over their wives.
Marriage relationships should be characterized by mutual love, respect, and seeking what is best for the other person. While the Bible calls for wives to voluntarily yield to their husbands’ leadership at times, it does so within the greater context of mutual submission. The emphasis is on following Christ’s model of servant leadership, not enforcing hierarchical gender roles. Christians acknowledge Christ as the ultimate authority over the marriage and the husband’s leadership should reflect Christ’s sacrificial love for the church.
There are differences of opinion amongst Christians regarding appropriate application of these biblical instructions for marriage relationships in modern contexts. Some maintain that a hierarchical structure with male leadership is mandated while others believe mutual submission without mandated gender roles is a more accurate interpretation. There is room for debate within orthodox Christianity.
In conclusion, the Bible does instruct Christian wives to submit to their husbands, primarily by deferring to their husbands’ leadership and judgment at times. However, this submission is meant to be voluntary, not coerced. It is motivated by reverence for Christ and paired with instructions for husbands to love their wives sacrificially. The overall goal is mutual submission between husbands and wives as they follow Christ’s example. Careful examination in context reveals that biblical submission does not necessitate inferiority or obedience to abuse.
Marriage relationships should be characterized by the fruits of the Spirit – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). Husbands and wives, united in Christ, can work through differences humbly and lovingly by submitting to one another as to the Lord.
The Bible calls all Christians to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21). This applies to marriage relationships as well. While the Bible instructs Christian wives to voluntarily submit to their husbands’ leadership, it does so within the greater call to mutual submission. Submission does not equate to inferiority, obedience or compliance with abuse. Rather, it involves deference and yielding in the spirit of Christ’s servant leadership, motivated by reverence for Him. Examining relevant biblical passages in context makes it clear that the Bible promotes mutual submission between husbands and wives even as it assigns different roles to each spouse.
Colossians 3:18-19 provides another example of how submission is paired with sacrificial love. Wives are instructed to submit to their husbands while husbands are commanded to love their wives and refrain from harshness. This passage establishes mutual respect and care as the context for a wife’s submission. 1 Peter 3:1-2 also addresses the behavior of wives with non-Christian husbands, emphasizing gentle conduct and sacrificial love as the means to win over their husbands. The emphasis is on reflecting Christlikeness more than demanding submission.
Nowhere in Scripture does the Bible condone abuse or dominance by husbands over their wives. The instructions given reflect cultural norms of patriarchy at that time, serving as a limiting force on a husband’s authority for the benefit of the wife. The call for mutual submission between Christian husbands and wives was very counter-cultural in the 1st century Greco-Roman world. Viewed in historical context, these passages served to elevate the status of women, not reinforce their inferiority.
The biblical pictures of marriage relationships based on mutual submission, sacrificial love and humility provide a model that Christian couples can aspire to today. Husbands and wives can show deference to one another, while remembering that Christ is the ultimate authority over their marriage. This biblical ideal of mutual submission transcends specific gender roles and cultural norms, focusing instead on reflecting Christlike character in how spouses relate to and honor one another.
There are differing perspectives among Christians regarding appropriate application of these biblical instructions for marriage relationships to modern contexts. Some maintain that male headship and female submission are mandated, while others believe mutual submission without hierarchical gender roles is a more faithful interpretation. There is room for debate within orthodox Christianity on the prudence and wisdom of applying certain biblical instructions today.
In cultures where women are considered inferior to men, the biblical instructions for mutual submission can elevate the status of women and reinforce their equal value before God. However, in societies where women enjoy equal rights, mandated female submission may undermine that progress. There are reasoned arguments on both sides of this issue within biblical Christianity. The most important principle is for spouses to outdo one another in love and sacrifice as they serve Christ above all.
The Bible was written in a patriarchal cultural context very different from modern society. instructions given to first century believers may not always translate directly into universal guidelines for all cultures across all time periods. Rather than codifying rules, the biblical ideal of mutual submission calls spouses to honor Christ by honoring each other, bearing with one another in love as partners united in Him.
There are certainly examples of godly marriages where the wife submits to her husband’s leadership according to a complementarian view of gender roles. However, there are also many instances where a hierarchical structure has enabled abuse. So there is wisdom in critically examining church traditions regarding gender and exercising care not to assert biblical authority for cultural norms that reflect the fallen human condition more than God’s ideal.
The biblical portrayal of mutual submission, with Christ as the supreme authority over marriage, transcends gender roles. It calls for all believers, whether husband or wife, to submit themselves one to another, honoring Christ above all. The emphasis is on cultivating Christlike humility, sacrificial love and mutual deference – values that apply to all Christian relationships.
While passages instructing wives to submit to their husbands reflect cultural norms of biblical times, the overall scriptural pattern of mutual submission offers liberating good news. By yielding to one another in reverence for Christ, couples can experience oneness, harmony and selfless love as they model God’s kingdom values of other-centeredness in their marriage relationship.
In conclusion, the Bible does call for wives to voluntarily submit to their husbands’ leadership out of reverence for Christ. However, biblical submission is not about inferiority or blind obedience. It involves deference, respect and yielding, motivated by love for Jesus. And it occurs in the context of mutual submission, with instructions for husbands to sacrificially love their wives.
Marriage relationships modeled on biblical principles will exhibit mutual love, patience, kindness and self-control as spouses submit to one another as to the Lord. While disagreements may occur, couples can resolve conflicts gently and humbly, keeping Christ at the center. They can serve one another, promote each other’s growth and seek each other’s good – behaviors that transcend any particular roles or cultural norms. This is the biblical model of mutual submission that brings glory to God.