Having a godly marriage that honors the Lord requires commitment, sacrifice, and following God’s principles for marriage found in the Bible. Here are some key ways couples can pursue a marriage centered on God:
Commit fully to your spouse and your marriage vows
Marriage is a covenant before God to love, cherish and remain faithful to your spouse for life (Matthew 19:6). We must diligently guard our marriages against temptation and be committed to keeping our vows no matter what challenges arise (Ecclesiastes 5:4-5). Do not let anything or anyone come between you and your spouse.
Make your relationship with God the foundation
No human relationship can fill the deepest needs of our soul. A couple’s first commitment should be growing in intimacy with Christ. When each spouse is rooted in God, they are better equipped to love and serve each other (Matthew 22:37-39). Make developing your faith through studying the Bible, prayer, worship, etc. a regular priority.
Pursue oneness and understanding
God created marriage so two become one flesh (Genesis 2:24). Intentionally pursue deep unity by spending quality time together, communicating openly and respectfully, showing grace during conflicts, honoring each other above yourselves, and developing shared purpose and interests (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12). Seek to truly understand your spouse’s needs, fears, hopes and dreams.
Love and cherish sincerely
A godly marriage overflows with the kind of sincere love described in 1 Corinthians 13. This involves patience, kindness, compassion, gentleness and forgiving wrongs. Spouses must nurture a spirit of gratitude for their marriage and consciously make their partner a priority over other relationships and pursuits. Lavish each other with respect, encouragement, affection and acts of service.
Embrace mutual submission
Husbands and wives must submit to one another out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21). There is no room in Christian marriage for control, selfishness or treating a spouse as inferior. Walk in humility, considering each other’s needs before your own and submitting to each other (Philippians 2:3-4).
Foster open and respectful communication
It’s vital for couples to develop the habit of communicating openly, honestly and respectfully with each other, even when discussing sensitive subjects. Listen without interrupting and speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). Seek understanding over making your point. Avoid anger, insults or dismissiveness. Be quick to forgive and keep no record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5).
Keep intimacy alive
Married couples have a duty to meet each other’s sexual needs and reserve sexual intimacy for their marriage (1 Corinthians 7:1-5). Make your physical relationship a priority amidst life’s busyness. Be intentional about keeping romance alive by spending regular one-on-one time, going on dates, giving small gifts just because, and doing thoughtful things that show love for your spouse.
Pursue oneness in Christ above all else
At the center of a godly marriage is having a shared, vibrant relationship with Jesus. Make worshiping, praying, studying Scripture and pursuing Christ together your highest aim. When you are both seeking the Lord first and foremost, your marriage will thrive. Let your common faith and values shape your life, parenting and purpose as a couple.
Surround your marriage with godly community
Having friendship and accountability with other believer couples helps strengthen marriages against temptation and hardship. Seek wise counsel from mature Christians when facing conflict and trials in your marriage (Proverbs 11:14). Look for opportunities to serve God together with the body of Christ, such as volunteering or joining a small group Bible study.
Extend grace during conflict and trials
No marriage is immune from times of tension, disagreement and hardship. During difficult seasons, couples must choose to extend grace and lean on God’s strength rather than their own. Be quick to seek forgiveness, reconciliation and healing. Turn to Scripture and prayer as your guide (Colossians 3:12-14). With God’s help, press on in faith that He will work all things for your good (Romans 8:28).
Make your home a place of gospel witness
As you grow in Christian marriage, make your relationship a light for others to see God’s love and transforming power. Show hospitality and serve others together. Make your home a welcoming place where people feel cared for. Let your words, actions and unity as a couple point to Jesus. Honor God in how you parent and raise your children, if blessed with them.
Trust God through every season of life
No matter what joys, challenges or transitions you face together – from newlywed years to empty nest, promotions to job loss, health to sickness – choose to trust in God’s sovereignty, goodness and faithful love. Rely on the Holy Spirit’s strength to weather every storm hand in hand. Look to God continuously for wisdom on how to love each other through it all.
Pursuing an intentional, godly marriage takes great commitment, but the rewards are eternal. As you seek the Lord together, He will richly bless your relationship, partnership and union. Your marriage will become an inspiring example of unconditional love and a reflection of Christ and the Church.