How should a Christian respond to bullying?
Bullying is unfortunately a common occurrence in many places, including schools, workplaces, and online spaces. As Christians, how should we respond when bullying happens to us or when we witness it happening to others? Here is a biblical guide to dealing with bullying in a godly way:
Do Not Retaliate or Seek Revenge
Our natural instinct when being bullied is often to fight back and get even. However, the Bible makes it clear that retaliation and revenge are not the right responses for followers of Christ (Romans 12:17-21, 1 Peter 3:9). Jesus calls us to turn the other cheek when struck (Matthew 5:39) and to love our enemies rather than retaliate (Luke 6:27-36). Seeking revenge only perpetuates the cycle of harm. As Christians, we are called to break that cycle by absorbing the blow ourselves without returning evil for evil.
Pray for Your Bullies
Praying for those who persecute us is one of the most counterintuitive yet powerful ways to respond to bullying as a Christian (Matthew 5:44). Rather than harboring bitterness, we can ask God to soften our bullies’ hearts and meet their deeper needs, which are often the source of bullying behavior. Sinful tendencies like pride, insecurity, and the need for power and control often underlie bullying. Bringing our bullies before God in prayer releases our pain to Him and opens the door for Him to work in their lives and ours.
Forgive Your Bullies
Following Jesus’ example of forgiving even His cruelest tormentors (Luke 23:24), we as Christians are called to forgive those who bully and mistreat us (Colossians 3:13). Forgiveness is often a process, but we can make the choice to forgive even if our emotions lag behind. This reflects the extravagant grace we have received from Christ (Ephesians 4:32). Forgiveness frees us from a victim mentality and leaves room for God to heal our hearts. We can hate the sin of bullying while forgiving the bully through Christ’s love.
Stand Up for Bullied People
The Bible calls us as Christians to defend the oppressed and speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves (Proverbs 31:8-9). When we witness bullying, we should intervene appropriately to come to the victim’s aid rather than being passive bystanders. We can call out the bullying behavior as wrong and refuse to join in. We can comfort and support victims in tangible ways.Reporting bullying to proper authorities is often needed to address the situation. As God’s hands and feet in the world, we are commanded to protect the vulnerable.
Examine Your Own Heart
Before rushing to condemn schoolyard bullies and online trolls, we as Christians need to reflect on our own capacity for cruelty. The Bible warns how easy it is to notice the speck in others’ eyes while ignoring the log in our own (Matthew 7:1-5). Elitism, gossip, slander, and arrogance all have roots in the sinful human heart. As Christians, we have no grounds for feeling morally superior to bullies until we plead with God to purify our own hearts and live humbly (Psalm 51:10). Removing the plank from our eyes prepares us to gently restore others rather than condemning them (Galatians 6:1).
Be a Good Example
The most powerful thing Christians can do in response to bullying is to model Jesus’ example of loving our enemies (Romans 12:20-21). Treating others with dignity and respect, refusing to demean people created in God’s image, going out of our way to show honor and kindness—these actions undermine bullying’s foothold. Young people often learn bullying behavior from the adults in their lives. As Christians, we can break those cycles by living peaceably with all people as much as possible (Romans 12:18). Our good example will often speak louder than our words.
Build a Culture of Kindness
Widespread bullying often points to problems in the underlying culture. As Christians, we can help foster environments where bullying is less likely to take root. Nourishing a culture of kindness, respect, community, and redemption is harder work than condemning individual bullies, but can effect greater change. We can affirm the values and policies needed to promote peace, and model reconciling broken relationships. By aiming to curb bullying on a systemic level through cultural change, we address the root causes rather than just the symptoms.
Trust God’s Justice and Mercy
When bullying seems to go unchecked, we as Christians must trust in God’s ultimate justice and mercy. The Bible promises that no suffering escapes God’s notice (Psalm 56:8). He is a strong tower for the oppressed and will redeem their pain (Psalm 9:9, Psalm 103:6). God hears their cries and will call every deed into account (Luke 18:7). But God also offers forgiveness and transformation to bullies who repent. While working to make our world more just, we can have faith that God will fully right every wrong either in this life or the next. His justice and mercy give us hope.
Find Strength in the Church Community
God often comforts and supports victims of bullying through the collective power of the church community. Scripture urges Christians to weep with those who weep and defend the weak together (Romans 12:15, Isaiah 1:17). The body of Christ can provide the empathy, counsel, encouragement, and refuge that victims of bullying desperately need during their time of trial (1 Corinthians 12:26, Galatians 6:2). It can also guide and redemptively discipline unrepentant bullies. Being united to our fellow believers helps us persevere and overcome the isolation of bullying.
Cling to the Hope of Eternal Life
For Christians who suffer ongoing, unrelenting bullying, we can find strength in the promise of eternal life free from all pain and injustice. The Bible compares the hardships of this age to “light momentary affliction” in contrast with the “eternal weight of glory” awaiting us (2 Corinthians 4:17). The hope of resurrection sustains us when earthly circumstances seem unbearable (1 Corinthians 15:54-57). God’s presence comforts us even in the darkest valley (Psalm 23:4). Clinging to God’s promises allows us to endure and even thrive in the midst of suffering (Romans 5:1-5). Our trials are momentary when viewed in light of eternity.
Grow in Patience and Character
Though incredibly difficult and painful in the moment, bullying can be redeemed by God to produce growth in our lives. As Christians, we trust that “suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope” (Romans 5:3-4). Patience, compassion, courage, and forgiveness are virtues forged in the furnace of affliction. By keeping eternity in view, we can see past the immediate anguish of bullying to the godly character it can develop in us. This growth equips us to minister to others experiencing hardship down the road (2 Corinthians 1:3-7).
Rely on God’s Strength
As Christians facing bullying, we have access to a source of strength greater than our own inner resources. The Bible promises that God’s power works through our weakness and suffering (2 Corinthians 12:9-10). His grace is sufficient to help us endure hardship (2 Corinthians 12:9). We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us (Philippians 4:13). When our strength runs out, we can ask God to renew our inner man day by day amid affliction (2 Corinthians 4:16-18). By relying on divine strength rather than our own, we receive power to overcome bullying’s effects with hope and courage.
The pain of bullying can tempt Christians to become bitter,Reactive, and hopeless. However, the Bible offers deeper ways to respond—with forgiveness, dignity, faith, and Christ-like love. When we draw strength from God and follow Jesus’ example, bullying’s power to destroy us gives way to God’s power to transform us. Our light afflictions produce an eternal glory that far outweighs the temporary sorrows of this life (2 Corinthians 4:17). Through the Holy Spirit, we can develop perseverance and surround others with the same comfort we have received from God in our times of need (2 Corinthians 1:3-4). Though unfair and grievous, bullying ultimately cannot separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:31-39). He will turn even the ugly sins of bullies to the good of those who love Him (Genesis 50:20, Romans 8:28). Our present sufferings are “preparing for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all” (2 Corinthians 4:17).