How should Christians respond to someone with Asperger’s?
Asperger’s syndrome is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by significant difficulties in social interaction and nonverbal communication, along with restricted and repetitive patterns of behavior and interests. It is considered an autism spectrum disorder (ASD). People with Asperger’s often have above-average intelligence but struggle with social skills and empathy.
As Christians, how should we respond when encountering and interacting with someone who has Asperger’s? Here are some biblical principles to keep in mind:
1. Treat them with love and compassion
The most important thing is to see them first as a person created in God’s image and worthy of dignity and respect (Genesis 1:27). Do not focus on their differences or limitations but show them the same grace and understanding you would want to receive yourself (Matthew 7:12). Be patient, kind, and forgiving in your interactions (Ephesians 4:32).
2. Accommodate their unique needs and challenges
Each person with Asperger’s is different, so take time to understand the specific ways their condition affects them. For some it may be sensory sensitivity, the need for routine, or difficulty making eye contact. Make reasonable accommodations to help minimize anxiety and allow them to participate (Romans 15:1-2). Adapt how you communicate to match their communication style.
3. Include them in community
The Body of Christ is diverse, with each member having unique gifts and challenges (1 Corinthians 12:12-27). Make an effort to invite and integrate those with Asperger’s into regular fellowship activities. But don’t force participation in ways that increase anxiety. Find ways for them to use their often high abilities to contribute to the group.
4. Offer support to families
Coming alongside families with an Asperger’s child with compassion can be a huge blessing. Parents often feel isolated and overwhelmed. Providing respite, helping problem-solve challenges, or offering words of encouragement can go a long way. Treat the parents with dignity too.
5. Focus on gifts, not just limitations
Each person, no matter their neurology, has unique God-given talents and abilities. Make an effort to discover and encourage the gifts of those with Asperger’s instead of just focusing on their weaknesses. Ask them about their special interests and preferred activities.
6. Be patient
Social skills we take for granted do not come naturally to those with Asperger’s. They may say or do things that seem inappropriate. Offer gentle correction, but do not condemn (Luke 6:37). Living with Asperger’s requires great effort. Extend generous grace.
7. Help them navigate social interaction
Gently guide them in learning social cues, body language, tone of voice, humor, sarcasm and other aspects of communication they struggle to pick up on. Explain these concepts clearly and specifically when misunderstandings happen. Don’t embarrass them by calling attention to mistakes in front of others.
8. Seek professional help when needed
While Asperger’s cannot be cured, therapy can teach important coping skills and responses. A professional can equip the person and family with tools tailored to managing stress, sensory issues, obsessive interests, tics, meltdowns and more. Offer to help find good referrals.
9. Advocate for inclusion and acceptance
There is a lack of understanding about Asperger’s in the church and society. Find opportunities to educate others and promote the dignity and value that all people have as image-bearers of God. Help make your church and community a welcoming place.
10. Point them to Christ
No diagnosis or limitation defines our identity in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17). Salvation is offered to all who believe, including those with developmental disabilities. Find ways to make the Gospel message accessible. Assure them of God’s unconditional love.
Living with Asperger’s presents unique challenges both for the individuals and those who love and interact with them. By applying these biblical principles, we as Christians can make a real difference in their lives. With compassion, understanding and support, we can help our brothers and sisters with Asperger’s to thrive and experience the richness of being part of the Body of Christ.
Galatians 6:2 – Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
1 Thessalonians 5:14 – And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.
Proverbs 31:8-9 – Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all who are destitute. Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy.
Matthew 25:40 – And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’
Romans 14:13 – Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother.
Philippians 2:3-4 – Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Ephesians 4:2 – With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love.
1 Corinthians 12:22 – On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 – Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!
1 Thessalonians 5:11 – Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.
Proverbs 17:17 – A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
Isaiah 41:10 – Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Psalm 145:18 – The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.
John 14:27 – Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.
2 Thessalonians 3:5 – May the Lord direct your hearts to the love of God and to the steadfastness of Christ.
Philippians 4:6-7 – Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Psalm 56:3 – When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.
Psalm 34:17-18 – When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 – But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Hebrews 4:15-16 – For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
Psalm 103:13-14 – As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.
Isaiah 40:29-31 – He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
Romans 8:38-39 – For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Psalm 23:1-6 – The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
Isaiah 43:1-3 – But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.”
Matthew 11:28-30 – Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Philippians 4:13 – I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Deuteronomy 31:6 – Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.
Psalm 34:4-7 – I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him and saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them.
Isaiah 41:13 – For I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, “Fear not, I am the one who helps you.”
Luke 12:22-24 – And he said to his disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat, nor about your body, what you will put on. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing. Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds!
John 16:33 – I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.
Psalm 119:50 – This is my comfort in my affliction, that your promise gives me life.
2 Corinthians 1:3-5 – Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.
Romans 8:31-32 – What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?
1 Peter 5:7 – Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
Psalm 46:1-3 – God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling.
Isaiah 26:3-4 – You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.
Philippians 4:8-9 – Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.
Proverbs 3:5-6 – Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
Psalm 147:3 – He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
Romans 8:28 – And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
Joshua 1:9 – Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.
Psalm 73:26 – My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
1 Peter 5:8-10 – Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.
Psalm 121:1-8 – I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand. The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life. The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forevermore.
Philippians 4:4-7 – Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Psalm 77:1-3 – I cry aloud to God, aloud to God, and he will hear me. In the day of my trouble I seek the Lord; in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints.
Psalm 9:9-10 – The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you.
2 Timothy 1:7 – For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.
Psalm 94:19 – When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.
Psalm 55:22 – Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.
Jeremiah 29:11 – For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Matthew 6:34 – “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.