The verse “love does not boast” comes from 1 Corinthians 13:4, which is part of the famous “love chapter” where the apostle Paul describes what true, godly love looks like. This verse tells us that one characteristic of real love is that it “does not boast.” To understand what this means, we first need to define what boasting is.
To boast is to speak with excessive pride about one’s achievements, possessions, or abilities in order to impress others. Boasting often involves exaggerating or stretching the truth about oneself. It’s focused on self-promotion and calling attention to oneself. The motivation behind boasting is a desire to appear important in the eyes of others.
Some examples of boasting would be saying things like: “I’m the best at [fill in the blank],” “Everyone wishes they were as talented/smart/popular as me,” “Look at how great I am,” “I have the best house/car/clothes,” etc. Boasting is usually done out of a heart of pride, arrogance, and insecurity.
So when Paul says love “does not boast,” he means that real love does not engage in self-promotion or talking oneself up out of pride. Here are some key points about why love does not boast:
- Love focuses on others, not self. Boasting draws attention to yourself, but love is others-focused.
- Boasting stems from pride, arrogance & insecurity. But true love is marked by humility, selflessness and confidence in God.
- Love values people for who they are. Boasting values appearances & achievements that impress people.
- Boasting exaggerates accomplishments to sound great. But love is truthful and sincere.
- Boasting is motivated by selfishness. But real love seeks to serve & lift others up.
The reason love does not boast is because boasting is inconsistent with the character of Christ and the gospel He brought. Jesus repeatedly shunned pride and self-exaltation, instead humbling Himself to serve, die for, and save sinful people (Philippians 2:3-8). The gospel is the ultimate picture of undeserved grace – God sending His Son not to be served but to serve and sacrifice Himself for unworthy sinners.
As followers of Christ, our lives are to reflect His sacrificial mindset and humble nature. The more we grow in godly love, the less we will be motivated by self-centered desires like the need to impress others or prove our worth by boasting. Love centered on God liberates us from prideful insecurities.
Here are some practical ways true love avoids boasting:
- Focus conversations on learning about others, not dominating with self-promotion.
- Celebrate team/group accomplishments, not just individual achievements.
- Be sincere in complimenting others without exaggerating flattery.
- Share credit for successes instead of taking all the glory.
- Take self-centeredness to God, asking for humility to esteem others over self.
- Confess pride and insecurity to trusted believers to be kept accountable.
- Meditate on the gospel of Christ crucified, the ultimate example of humble love.
In summary, “love does not boast” means that godly love avoids proud, self-centered speech and behavior designed to impress others. Instead, true Christlike love focuses on humble service to God and others. It values people over appearances. Boasting is fuelled by pride and insecurity, but biblical love is marked by humility, honesty, and confidence in God rather than self. Our lives will reflect more godly love as we grow in the character of Christ.
Let’s look at some examples from the Bible that illustrate what love not boasting looks like:
1. Jesus washed His disciples’ feet (John 13:1-17)
On the night before His crucifixion, Jesus washed His disciples’ dirty feet. Footwashing was a task reserved for the lowliest servants, yet Christ humbled Himself to serve His followers and set an example of humility. Rather than boasting of His authority as Lord and Teacher, Jesus stooped down in lowly service, showing that true love “does not boast.”
2. Jesus condemned the prideful Pharisee (Luke 18:9-14)
Jesus told a parable contrasting a boastful Pharisee who touted his own virtue while looking down on others, versus a humble tax collector who pleaded for mercy. Jesus condemned the religious leader’s arrogance and declared it was the humble man who was justified before God. Pride and boasting are sins that love avoids.
3. Paul boasted only in his weaknesses (2 Corinthians 11:16-12:10)
Pressured to defend his validity as an apostle, Paul reluctantly highlighted his sacrifices and noble deeds. But he concluded that boasting of achievements was meaningless “foolishness.” Instead, Paul took pride only in his weaknesses, through which God’s power was made perfect. This models how godly love expresses humility, not pride in one’s merits.
4. Love is not arrogant, self-seeking, or rude (1 Corinthians 13:4-5)
In describing what love is and is not, Paul lists three characteristics similar to boasting that are avoided by real love: arrogance (excessive pride), self-seeking (living to promote self), and rudeness (lack of respect for others). Each of these reflects a focus on self, not others, which love avoids.
5. Love builds others up, it does not puff up self (1 Corinthians 8:1)
Paul cautions that “knowledge puffs up but love builds up.” Even knowing spiritual truths can breed pride if not accompanied by selfless love. Rather than puffing self up, godly love uses whatever knowledge and gifts it may have to serve others and build them up in the faith.
These passages give biblical illustrations of what it looks like in practice for godly love to avoid boasting, pride, and self-promotion. Christ and the apostles repeatedly modeled humility and self-sacrifice rather than arrogant self-focus. God calls His children to reflect His loving character.
There are also many potential negative consequences when people boast:
- Boasting breeds arrogance, disunity, and jealousy within relationships.
- Pride often leads to harming others through putting them down or exploiting them for selfish gain.
- Boasting can drive people away, resulting in relational isolation and loneliness.
- Obsessing over outward appearances and achievements to impress others can lead to anxiety, emptiness and depression.
- Pride and arrogance can result in devastating falls when our sins and weaknesses are eventually exposed.
- Self-promotion contradicts the gospel, marring our testimony as Christians if we are boasting but not loving humbly.
In contrast, the positive fruits of not boasting include:
- Humility draws people close and builds intimate, trusting relationships.
- Not needing to impress people with status or bragging leads to emotional freedom.
- Focusing on others’ needs and building them up bears the good fruit of love in their lives.
- Honesty and sincerity that come from low pride enhance our witness for Christ.
- Confidence in our identity in Christ frees us from seeking significance through boasting.
- Authentic love and service, not ego-driven pride, become the marks of our lives.
In summary, boasting is fueled by pride and breeds arrogance, disconnection, anxiety, hypocrisy, and other fruits of a self-focused life. But the Christlike love that avoids boasting produces humility, sincerity, emotional health, strong relationships, and an others-serving character that honors God. The choice is ours: love God and others by avoiding pride and boasting, or love self and reap the ugly fruits.
Here are some more insights on why love does not boast:
- Boasting focuses attention on self, but love focuses on God and neighbor. The two are incompatible.
- Pride seeks human praise, but love seeks to please God and serve others. There is no room left for boasting.
- Boasting exaggerates one’s importance, but love values all people equally as God’s image-bearers.
- Bragging trumpets one’s own works, but love directs praise to God who works through us.
- Love rejoices when others are honored (Romans 12:15). Boasting rejoices when self is elevated.
- Boasting strains for impact and applause, but love flows freely with no need to impress.
- Pride pretends, but love is genuine. Boasting hides insecurities, but love rests secure in Christ.
The more our souls find satisfaction in God, the less we will seek significance through boasting. Loving and valuing people for who they are in Christ frees us from using them to prop up our ego. Our security is not based on appearances and achievements, but on being beloved children of God.
One key spiritual practice that helps overcome boasting and pride is regularly praying prayers of examen, asking God to reveal our underlying motivations and idolatrous desires behind sinful thoughts, words and actions. Confessing specific instances of boasting and repenting of arrogant heart attitudes that feed our pride. Praying for the Holy Spirit’s help to walk humbly, speak sincerely, and find rest and affirmation in Christ alone.
As we grow deeper in relationship with Jesus, seeing both His perfect love for us and His perfect humility by coming as a servant, we cannot help but be transformed into greater Christlikeness. Pride and boasting simply fade away when our inner being is filled with the beauty of Jesus. Loving others also becomes the natural fruit of His love filling our hearts.
In closing, “love does not boast” means that godly, mature love avoids pride, arrogance and self-exaltation. Christlike love flows from humility and sincerity, focusing on others’ interests above selfish desires. While boasting promotes self, biblical love promotes God’s glory and other people’s wellbeing. Our lives will reveal more of God’s character as we grow in loving others the way Jesus loves us.