The verse in Proverbs 5:18 states “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth.” This verse comes in the context of wisdom given to a son from a father, instructing him to avoid sexual immorality and adultery, and instead find satisfaction and joy in his own wife.
To “rejoice in the wife of your youth” means several things:
- It means you should find joy, pleasure and satisfaction in your wife that you married when you were younger, rather than looking elsewhere for sexual fulfillment. You are to delight in her physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
- It reflects the importance of maintaining strength and freshness in your marriage. Even as you both grow older, you should keep your love for your wife alive. You should not become “bored” with her or fail to cultivate intimacy.
- It implies faithfulness and commitment to the covenant of marriage. The wife of your youth is the woman you pledged to stay with for life, in sickness and health, for better or worse. Rejoicing in her reflects an unwavering devotion.
- It means you should still pursue your wife and seek to win her heart, even after many years of marriage. You should not become complacent in allowing the spark of romance to fade.
- It reflects seeing your wife as a gift from God, and appreciating the blessing it is to be bound together with her. She is your companion and friend for life.
- It suggests you should speak highly of your wife and her virtues. You should not take her for granted or speak negatively about her to others.
- It means protecting your wife’s honor and reputation. You should not make her feel jealous or insecure in the marriage.
- It reflects care for your wife’s emotional, physical and spiritual well-being. You should nourish her and cherish her as an integral part of yourself.
- It implies remaining attracted to her and keeping an active love life over the course of marriage. You delight in her body and intimacy.
- It means turning your eyes and heart away from lusting after other women. Your desire and affection is reserved for your wife alone.
In summary, rejoicing in the wife of your youth means devoting yourself fully to your wife in body, mind and spirit. It reflects valuing her, cherishing her, protecting her, and expressing lifelong love and faithfulness to her. This brings honor to marriage and prevents sexual immorality. A husband is to delight in his wife, cultivate closeness with her, see her as God’s gift, and keep his covenant to love her alone. The passionate love between a husband and wife is to be reserved for each other.
1. Devoting Yourself Fully to Your Wife
The foremost understanding of rejoicing in the wife of your youth is giving yourself wholly to her in body, mind and spirit. It is focusing the fullness of your marital passion, affection and commitment to your wife alone. This stands in contrast to sexual immorality where a man divides himself among multiple women and fails to devote himself to his wife. Rejoicing in your wife means centering your intimacy, both physical and emotional, upon her.
This involves delighting in her in every way. You are to enjoy her physically, emotionally, intellectually and spiritually. Every husband should gaze upon his wife with admiration, affection and attraction. He should be stirred with passion and filled with love for her. He should be captivated by her heart, character and companionship. In rejoicing, you are not simply tolerating or putting up with your wife. Rather, you genuinely treasure who she is and the gift she is to you.
Rejoicing also requires being satisfied in her. You forsake chasing the allure of unfamiliar women and remain content with your bride. Your wife fills your heart and thoughts so you do not crave intimacy elsewhere. While maintaining attraction takes work, the same wife of your youth can bring immense fulfillment if you devote yourself to her.
Furthermore, rejoicing reflects faithfulness. You stand by your marital vows to forsake all others. Your eyes, hands and heart belong exclusively to your wife. You protect your covenant by steering clear of temptations. You focus on your bride, not wandering hearts and eyes. A husband who rejoices goes all in for his wife.
2. Cultivating Fresh Love and Romance
Rejoicing also carries the sense of keeping love fresh and exciting in marriage over the long term. It is easy in the first years of marriage to have a sense of thrill, desire and vibrant romance. But passions can wane as you get caught in the dull routines of life. Rejoicing means you still pursue your wife, win her heart and kindle closeness even after many years together. You never stop dating your wife and fanning the flames of intimacy.
This requires initiative, creativity, sacrifice and effort. It means turning off distractions and being fully present with your wife, giving her your undivided attention. It involves planning date nights and getaways where you can rekindle intimacy. It means overlooking faults, choosing to speak gracious words, and looking for ways to surprise and cherish her. A husband must care enough to nurture romance in order to nourish the marriage.
Rejoicing also means protecting time together and safeguarding your bond from the clutter competing for your time and affection. Don’t let kids, work, screens or hobbies crowd out your wife. Be vigilant to strengthen your foundation so that your love will flourish.
Moreover, rejoicing involves knowing your wife intimately – her desires, fears, dreams and passions. Draw her out and listen attentively to foster an emotional connection. Seek true understanding of who she is. Renew commitment to selfless service that demonstrates your devotion. These actions keep love alive.
3. Honoring Marriage and Spurning Adultery
This command is set in the context of warning a son against adultery and urging faithfulness to his wife. The father says to “rejoice in the wife of your youth” as the alternative to consorting with adulteresses, being led astray by flattery, and destroying oneself by lack of discipline (Proverbs 5:15-23). Marital devotion leaves no room for sexual immorality.
So a core emphasis in this verse is honoring marriage and rejecting the temptation towards adultery. Your wife is to be your sole object of affection. Do not degrade your marriage by diffusion of sexual energies. God designed marriage for one man and woman to be united in sacred covenant. Therefore, rejoicing in your wife means forsaking all others.
This requires rejecting flirtations from other women and fleeing temptations aggressively. Do not entertain thoughts of infidelity in your heart. Avoid compromising situations and relationships. Nourish complete satisfaction in your wife so you are not susceptible to seduction.
Rejoicing in your wife involves intentionally steering your heart away from adultery by setting wise boundaries. You should treat other women with respect while still practicing emotional and physical faithfulness. Protect your union through moral discipline.
4. Seeing Marriage as a Blessing and Gift
Rejoicing further reflects an attitude of gratefulness for the wife God has given you. Your wife is a blessing and gift, not a burden. Even in challenging times, you remember this gift is an act of God’s kindness. Thankfulness fosters joy and strengthens love. It prevents taking your wife for granted.
See each day together as the gift it is. Do not dwell on petty complaints that corrode contentment. Meditate on the privilege it is to share life with your wife. There are so many who long for a companion. Remember when you first met and delight again in her presence. Appreciate her anew and be amazed by God’s grace in bringing you together.
Also recall the honor of being entrusted as your wife’s husband. She has given herself to you in intimacy and vulnerability. She has put her life, body and heart in your hands. Revere the gift of her trust. Seek by God’s power to be worthy of that trust.
A rejoicing heart revels in God’s goodness. Thanksgiving spurs actions of love. Grace says that even when your wife is unlovely, you still give thanks that she is yours. Choose daily to see marriage as the treasure it is meant to be.
5. Speaking Highly of Your Wife
Another facet of rejoicing in your wife is speaking highly of her to others. When you rejoice in someone, you praise her virtues and bless her name. In contrast, putting down your wife or criticizing her reveals a lack of joy. Let your speech reflect your admiration.
Speak well of her to your kids so they will honor her. Build up her reputation among family and friends. Compliment her strengths and tell others of her noble qualities. Your wife should hear you brag on her. Kind words heal hearts and build intimacy.
Also, refuse to joke about your wife’s shortcomings. Do not expose private matters or embarrass her. Speak of her in ways that reveal your pride, not your disappointment. Uplift her with your words.
Furthermore, intercede for your wife in prayer. Call forth her hidden potentials. Ask God to bless her and perfect her. Thank Him for giving you her as your bride. Let your words before God and man affirm your treasure.
6. Protecting Her Honor and Reputation
Rejoicing also entails protecting your wife’s honor and shielding her reputation. You guard what is precious. This means refusing any speech or action that would undermine her dignity in the eyes of others.
Never make your wife feel jealous, insecure or unimportant in your eyes. Do not flirt or joke about infidelity. These things degrade her worth. Be ever vigilant against threats of unfaithfulness or betrayal. Stand in the gap shielding your marriage from harm.
Also refuse to compare your wife to other women in ways that shame her. Celebrate her uniqueness. Do not criticize her appearance or abilities. Seek to build her up, not tear her down. Affirm that she is perfect for you.
Moreover, keep private matters private between you. Do not expose any embarrassing detail, weakness or struggle. Protect her dignity. She must know you can be entrusted with her heart.
Furthermore, come to your wife’s defense when others speak poorly of her. Correct them and honor her reputation. Valiantly protect her rather than staying quiet. In all things, treat your wife with the utmost esteem.
7. Caring for Her Well-Being
Rejoicing also includes caring diligently for your wife’s well-being. Your passion translates into service on her behalf. Seek to understand her needs and meet them generously. Be thoughtful of how to lighten her load and bless her.
Outdo her in showing honor and granting preference. Open doors, give up your seat, and treat her like a queen. Labor cheerfully to provide for her. Bear burdens that would weigh her down. Look for tangible ways every day to cherish her and treat her specially.
Moreover, nourish her emotional health. Give comfort when she is distressed. Be patient when she is difficult. Overlook minor offenses. Bear her weaknesses. Encourage her in the Lord. Let her find refuge in your arms from every storm.
Likewise care for her physical body. See that she eats right, stays active, and has rest. Be attuned to health needs. Protect her safety. Make your home a sanctuary where she can flourish.
Most importantly, spur her spiritual growth. Pray for her and with her. Study the Word together. Instill wisdom in your children. Model godliness. Kindle her love for Christ more than anything else. Care well for her whole person.
8. Maintaining an Active Love Life
Rejoicing also implies keeping physical intimacy vibrant. The fullness of rejoicing necessitates an active and enjoyable sex life as husband and wife. Your passion for your wife is to be expressed regularly in romantic encounters. This builds the one-flesh union.
Marriage is designed by God to include sexual pleasure and fulfillment. So nourish intimacy through time alone focused on physical love. Avoid the tendency to replace sex with mere friendship. Prioritize making your bed a place of enjoyment, refreshment and connection.
Pursue new ways to show affection and awaken desire. Maintain an adventurous rather than monotonous love life. Seek to satisfy each other’s longings. Be attentive to changes with time and adjust accordingly. Embrace passion as a gift to delight in.
Moreover, ensure your wife feels secure rather than objectified during intimacy. She must trust you love all of her. Warm her heart as you enjoy her body. Make your marriage bed undefiled, holy and glorious by keeping all focus on your beloved.
9. Turning Away from Lust
Lust and rejoicing in your wife cannot coexist. When your heart strays towards images or fantasies of other women, your affection for your wife is compromised. Guard your eyes, heart and thoughts from adulterous lust.
Do not entertain sexual thoughts about another woman, even briefly. Flee from sources of temptation. Install filters and accountability. Fix your heart and mind entirely on your bride. Never compare her physically to images that incite covetous thoughts.
Keep intimacy energized in marriage so you are not susceptible to lust’s hollow promises of satisfaction. Renew your mind to see your wife as wholeheartedly beautiful. Reject lust’s lies that stolen water is sweeter.
Rejoicing in your wife means keeping your focus on cherishing and enjoying her. Let your only passion be for your one and only. Adulterous desire will poison marital intimacy and ruin the gift of marriage. So guard your heart and devote yourself fully.
10. Summary
Rejoicing in the wife of your youth means valuing her, pursuing her, serving her, protecting her, and loving her passionately for a lifetime. She is your treasure, your companion, your sole romantic focus. You nourish an intimate soul connection and maintain lifelong fidelity.
Rejoicing involves communication, sacrifice, service and tokens of devotion. It means upholding marriage exclusively as designed by God, spurning adultery. A husband is to care for his wife’s whole person and find joy in each part of her being.
Marriage is a gift to enjoy, not just endure. Delight in your wife. Seek fresh romance. Give your all to her. Turn from temptation. Let your passion for your bride overflow as you rejoice in her all your days.