Backbiting refers to the act of speaking unfavorably about someone who is not present. It often involves sharing information that will make others think negatively of the person being discussed. Backbiting goes against principles in the Bible about how we should treat others.
Here is an overview of some of the main biblical passages about backbiting and the key points they reveal:
Backbiting is condemned in Scripture
Several verses directly condemn backbiting as a sin:
- “Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.” (James 4:11)
- “Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.” (Ephesians 4:25)
- “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” (Ephesians 4:29)
- “You shall not go around as a slanderer among your people, and you shall not stand up against the life of your neighbor: I am the Lord.” (Leviticus 19:16)
- “Whoever secretly slanders his neighbor, him I will destroy. No one who has a haughty look and an arrogant heart will I endure.” (Psalm 101:5)
These verses reveal that backbiting is a serious offense. Scripture condemns backbiting as evil, false, corrupting, and slanderous. The Bible tells us to put away such speech and instead speak truthfully and build others up.
Backbiting is rooted in pride and lack of love
Backbiting often stems from wrong attitudes of pride and lack of love for others:
- “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:4)
- “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-5)
- “Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:3-4)
The Bible teaches we should be humble, love others, and look out for their interests. Backbiting fails to do this. Focusing on the faults of others often stems from pride, jealousy, and lack of love in our own hearts.
Backbiting causes great harm
Backbiting is not harmless gossip. It can severely damage relationships and reputations:
- “A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.” (Proverbs 16:28)
- “Argue your case with your neighbor himself, and do not reveal another’s secret.” (Proverbs 25:9)
- “The words of a whisperer are like delicious morsels; they go down into the inner parts of the body.” (Proverbs 18:8)
Rather than bring people together, backbiting often destroys relationships. It breaches trust and can deeply hurt those being talked about.
We will be held accountable for backbiting
Scripture contains sober warnings that God will judge our speech:
- “On the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak.” (Matthew 12:36)
- “There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off.” (Proverbs 23:18)
- “So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.” (James 4:17)
Since backbiting is clearly wrong, we will be held responsible for this sin. These verses encourage us to carefully consider our words.
We should speak to others directly
Rather than talk behind people’s backs, the Bible says we should speak directly to them:
- “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.” (Matthew 18:15)
- “Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)
- “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” (Ephesians 4:29)
Scripture promotes speaking directly with others to work through issues. Backbiting does the opposite by talking to everyone except the person involved.
We should build others up with our speech
Rather than tear down with our words, the Bible tells us to use speech to encourage and build up:
- “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” (Ephesians 4:29)
- “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (Ephesians 4:29)
- “Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up.” (Proverbs 12:25)
These verses reveal how powerful our words can be to help others. Constructive speech should be our aim.
Ask God for help overcoming backbiting
Since backbiting is so natural, we need God’s help to overcome it:
- “I will guard my ways, that I may not sin with my tongue; I will guard my mouth with a muzzle.” (Psalm 39:1)
- “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!” (Psalm 141:3)
- “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.” (Psalm 19:14)
We should continually ask God to help control our speech. Seeking Him is key in changing our hearts and living out His Word.
Replace backbiting with praise and testimony
Rather than obsessing over others’ faults, Scripture encourages focusing on praise and sharing what God has done in our lives:
- “I will bless the Lord at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth.” (Psalm 34:1)
- “My soul makes its boast in the Lord…Oh, magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together!” (Psalm 34:2-3)
- “And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.” (Revelation 12:11)
Keeping our speech centered on worshipping God and testifying to His work replaces the tendency to backbite. Lifting others up can become natural when our focus shifts.
We must show mercy as we desire it
Since we all fail and need grace, Scripture reminds us to extend mercy to others:
- “For judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment.” (James 2:13)
- “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.” (Matthew 5:7)
- “Speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.” (Titus 3:2)
Remembering our own flaws and dependence on God’s mercy helps us graciously cover over the faults of others. This empowers us to avoid backbiting.
Love covers over offenses
Rather than expose people’s sins, true love covers them:
- “Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.” (Proverbs 17:9)
- “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8)
- “Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.” (Proverbs 10:12)
Backbiting spreads stories about people’s faults. But the Bible says love handles sins discretely and doesn’t dwell on offenses. This protects relationships.
Backbiting spreads darkness rather than light
Believers are called to spread light and hope, not darkness:
- “Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but instead even expose them.” (Ephesians 5:11)
- “You are the light of the world.” (Matthew 5:14)
- “The people dwelling in darkness have seen a great light, and for those dwelling in the region and shadow of death, on them a light has dawned.” (Matthew 4:16)
Through Christ we have hope, and are called to shine this light to others. Backbiting manifests spiritual darkness rather than hope and redemption.
We reap what we sow with our words
Our words have consequences for good or ill. Sowing backbiting brings a negative harvest:
- “By your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matthew 12:37)
- “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.” (Galatians 6:7)
- “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” (Proverbs 12:18)
Thoughtlessly spreading stories about others’ sins may seem harmless. But Scripture warns our careless words can come back to haunt us.
Humbly correct others when necessary
While backbiting focuses on faults unnecessarily, there may be times we need to humbly confront sin. Scripture guides how to do this:
- “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness.” (Galatians 6:1)
- “Let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.” (James 5:20)
- “When I say to the wicked, ‘You shall surely die,’ and you give him no warning, nor speak to warn the wicked from his wicked way, in order to save his life, that wicked person shall die for his iniquity, but his blood I will require at your hand.” (Ezekiel 3:18)
At times correction and warning may be needed. But Scripture shows this should be done privately, gently, humbly, and motivated by love.
God commands impartiality, not favoritism
We are called to treat all people fairly, not just favor those we prefer:
- “But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.” (James 3:17)
- “My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory.” (James 2:1)
- “You shall do no injustice in court. You shall not be partial to the poor or defer to the great, but in righteousness shall you judge your neighbor.” (Leviticus 19:15)
Regrettably backbiting is often unfairly directed at those we dislike. Yet God calls us to rise above favoritism and petty biases.
Our real battle is not against people
Scripture reminds us people are not the ultimate enemy; spiritual forces of evil are:
- “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” (Ephesians 6:12)
- “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.” (Ephesians 4:26-27)
- “Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” (1 Peter 5:8)
Backbiting is often a tactic of the enemy to breed bitterness, envy, and division among God’s people. Remembering the real battle is against spiritual powers rather than people can help us avoid it.
Summary
In summary, the Bible contains many warnings against backbiting as well as guidance for constructive speech. Key points include:
- Backbiting is a serious sin that destroys relationships and reputations.
- It often stems from pride, envy, and lack of love in our hearts.
- We will be held accountable for careless words.
- Rather than talk behind backs, we should speak to people directly about issues.
- Our speech should build others up.
- We overcome backbiting by seeking God’s help and focusing our words on praise.
- Showing mercy and love covers over offenses rather than spreading them.
- At times humbly warning others of sin may be needed.
- But in general we are called to impartiality, not favoritism and gossip.
In all things we can cling to God’s grace and the power of His Spirit to renew our speech. As we grow in love for others, backbiting diminishes and our words become life-giving.