Forgiveness is a central theme in the Bible, as sin separates us from God and we need His forgiveness to be reconciled to Him. The Bible teaches that God is loving and merciful, eager to forgive those who repent and turn to Him (Psalm 86:5, Isaiah 55:7). Through the atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross, God made a way for our sins to be forgiven so we can have a restored relationship with Him (Colossians 1:13-14). As recipients of God’s great forgiveness, Christians are called to extend forgiveness to others, even enemies, just as God has forgiven us (Matthew 6:14-15). But what exactly is forgiveness from a biblical perspective? Here is an overview of some key principles about forgiveness that emerge from Scripture.
Forgiveness Means Letting Go of Resentment
A foundational component of forgiveness is releasing bitterness, anger, and resentment towards someone who has wronged or hurt us (Ephesians 4:31-32). This doesn’t mean denying or minimizing the seriousness of the offense, but rather a conscious choice to not harbor hostile feelings and desire for revenge. Forgiveness means we no longer hold a person’s sin against them in a spirit of resentment or retaliation. Even if consequences remain for the offense, we release them from condemnation in our own minds.
Forgiveness Is Not Conditional
Genuine forgiveness is given freely and unconditionally, not based on an offender apologizing or making amends (Luke 6:27-28). We forgive others out of grace, even if they don’t deserve it or repent, just as God has freely forgiven us. Forgiveness should come from the heart, not waiting for the other person to meet certain conditions or expectations first. We forgive even if others never find out or fail to reciprocate.
Forgiveness May Take Time
While we are called to have a heart willing to freely forgive, complete forgiveness is often a process that takes time. Depending on the severity of the offense, we may pass through stages like hurt, anger and desire for revenge before reaching a place of full forgiveness. God understands this struggle (Psalm 103:13-14). But we should actively work to let go of bitterness and extend mercy, not clinging to pain and resentment for too long. God can heal our emotions and give us the strength to wholly forgive others if we surrender it to Him.
Forgiveness and Trust Are Different
Forgiveness does not necessarily mean fully restoring a relationship and the level of trust that existed before. Forgiveness involves releasing our resentment and desire for vengeance, but trust must be rebuilt over time (Proverbs 25:19). We forgive others because it is right and obedient to God, whether or not the relationship ever fully recovers. In certain cases, continuing contact may allow more injury or not be wise until trust is re-established. But regardless, we can still forgive others even if trust is difficult to regain.
Forgiveness Brings Freedom and Peace
Choosing not to forgive leads to bitterness and ongoing pain, whereas offering true forgiveness brings healing, freedom and peace of mind (Proverbs 17:9, Romans 12:17-19). Forgiveness allows the offended person to release hurt and move forward, leaving justice to God rather than seeking personal vengeance. It brings wholeness where there was once resentment and hostility. Forgiveness also opens the door for reconciliation and restored relationships, where possible. Letting go of the past through forgiveness enables us to live fully in the present with a heart of mercy and compassion.
Forgiveness Does Not Necessarily Mean Forgetting
While we choose not to dwell on or bring up past hurts over and over, forgiveness does not always equal total forgetting. Emotional wounds take time to heal. Godly forgiveness means we do not continually brood over what someone did or harbor ongoing resentment. However, we may still remember the offense. Forgetting may occur over time, but is not always the immediate result of forgiving someone. The key is that remembering does not lead to bitterness and hatred rising up again.
We Must Forgive Others Because God Has Forgiven Us
A life-altering truth about forgiveness emerges from Jesus’ parable in Matthew 18:21-35. God has forgiven our sins completely through Christ, beyond anything we could ever deserve. So we must extend the same lavish grace toward others, no matter how difficult (Ephesians 4:32). If we grasp the depths of mercy God has shown toward us, we will want to forgive others. Those who know God’s forgiveness well are compelled to forgive greatly (Luke 7:47). It is hypocritical to receive God’s forgiveness yet withhold forgiveness from others.
Asking and Giving Forgiveness Is Important
It is wise to specifically ask forgiveness from someone we have hurt or wronged, which helps bring release and closure (James 5:16). The Bible also instructs us to honestly and gently confront someone who has sinned against us, giving opportunity for them to repent and reconcile the relationship (Matthew 18:15-17). Freely forgiving others when differences arise, whether or not they apologize, is also crucial for maintaining unity, modeling Christ’s love, and glorifying God (Colossians 3:13).
Forgiveness Is an Act of Obedience to God
Christ commands His followers to forgive others from the heart and unconditionally, just as He has forgiven us (Matthew 6:14-15, Mark 11:25). Therefore, forgiveness is an act of obedience and faith in God, regardless of whether or not reconciliation with another person is possible. It may require yielding our natural desires for justice and vengeance to God, trusting Him to deal justly with those who hurt us. But our part is showing mercy, not seeking retaliation.
Forgiveness Brings Spiritual Benefits
The Bible connects forgiveness with many spiritual benefits, like restored joy, meaning, purpose, lighter burdens, and closer relationship with God (Psalm 32:1-2, Matthew 11:28-30). Maintaining an unforgiving heart has negative effects, whereas freely forgiving others brings freedom, wholeness, and overflowing blessing in return (Psalm 18:25-26, Matthew 5:7). As Jesus taught, if we forgive, we will be forgiven by God (Matthew 6:14). A forgiving spirit also makes us mature spiritually (Colossians 3:13).
Forgiveness Was Demonstrated Through Jesus’ Sacrifice
Jesus Christ forgave even His enemies as He hung on the cross in terrible agony (Luke 23:34). Though fully God, Jesus exemplified what it means for us to forgive unconditionally. While being tortured unjustly, Jesus asked God to forgive those responsible, showing remarkable mercy (Isaiah 53:12). His sacrifice on the cross opened the way for humankind to receive total forgiveness and reconciliation with God once and for all (Romans 5:8-11, Hebrews 9:12-15).
Christians Are Called to Forgive Others as God Has Forgiven Us
One of Jesus’ messages was that those who have been forgiven much by God ought to forgive others greatly in return (Luke 7:36-50). As recipients of God’s undeserved mercy, Christians are to freely extend forgiveness to others when wronged, no matter how significant the offense. Just as Christ lovingly forgave us and gave His life to make our forgiveness possible, we are called to forgive others from a transformed heart (Ephesians 4:32-5:2).
Forgiveness Is Not Optional for Believers
Jesus teaches that forgiving others is not optional, but essential for believers who have been forgiven by God (Matthew 6:15). A judgmental, unforgiving heart is incompatible with true Christian faith. Followers of Christ are to forgive from the heart (Matthew 18:35). Holding onto bitterness and anger towards others grieves the Holy Spirit and gives the enemy a foothold. As difficult as it may be, Christians must make a practice of forgiving others, just as we have been forgiven.
Praying for Those Who Have Hurt You Aids Forgiveness
Though counterintuitive, praying for someone who has harmed or offended you can help release bitterness and open the heart to sincere forgiveness. As Jesus taught, we are to love our enemies, bless those who curse us, and pray for those who mistreat us (Luke 6:27-28). Praying God’s blessings on someone who has wronged you, rather than vengeance, changes your heart posture towards them. Asking God to also forgive and bless them makes it easier to let go of resentment and desire for revenge.
Forgiveness and Reconciliation May Be Separate Processes
Forgiving someone is possible regardless of their response, but reconciliation depends on cooperation from both parties. We forgive unilaterally from the heart because it is right and obedient to God. But restoring trust and rebuilding a damaged relationship requires mutual humility, repentance, and forgiveness. The offending person may remain unwilling or unable to reconcile for various reasons. As much as possible, we should seek restored relations when forgiveness has occurred. But forgiveness itself does not hinge on whether or not reconciliation ever fully happens.
Accountability and Forgiveness Work Together
Genuine forgiveness does not mean ignoring wrong behavior or eliminating consequences. Forgiveness involves letting go of personal offense and desire for revenge, not overlooking truth. The Bible offers a model where compassionate accountability and forgiveness work in tandem (see Galatians 6:1). Christians have a responsibility to gently confront a brother or sister in sin, while forgiving and restoring them with mercy. God sometimes disciplines those He loves, while always forgiving them in Christ (Hebrews 12:6).
Forgiveness Is a Process That Takes Time
Since forgiveness is challenging, especially when the hurt is deep, Scripture views it as an ongoing process. We may need to forgive someone multiple times as thoughts of the offense resurface (Matthew 18:21-22). Forgiveness is a decision, but working through the emotional consequences happens gradually. However, we find strength and grace from God to persevere in forgiving others, even if occasional feelings of resentment creep back in. As we continually offer forgiveness, peace and freedom eventually eclipse bitterness.
Practicing Forgiveness Is Essential for Spiritual Health
While extending forgiveness can be extremely difficult, Scripture portrays it as vital for our relationship with God and spiritual well-being (Matthew 6:14-15). Clinging to offenses leads to worsening bitterness and isolation from God’s grace. Believers who want to grow spiritually must make forgiveness an ongoing practice, rather than based on feeling like it. As we walk in forgiveness, our capacity to show grace and mercy expands. It brings wholeness and freedom that enable us to live fully.
We Are Called to Forgive Others in the Same Way God Forgives Us
Since we are totally dependent on God’s mercy and forgiveness through Christ, we are to forgive others out of humility and grace, not superiority (Ephesians 4:32). The way God forgives us unconditionally, lavishly, repeatedly, and from the heart is the model for how Christians are called to forgive others in return. We forgive even when it seems undeserved, because we have been forgiven far beyond what we deserve. Our forgiveness toward others should reflect the perfect forgiveness we receive from God.
Forgiveness Can Be Difficult, But God Gives Us Strength
Choosing to forgive is often extremely difficult and goes against our natural instincts of self-protection and seeing justice served (Romans 12:19). However, Scripture promises that God’s grace is sufficient to help us forgive others (2 Corinthians 12:9-10). As we yield control of the situation to the Lord in prayer, He empowers us supernaturally to release resentment and offer undeserved mercy instead. This brings tremendous freedom and spiritual healing.
Forgiveness Brings Healing and Restoration
Genuine forgiveness opens the door for mended relationships that seemed impossible. Offering and receiving forgiveness brings emotional and spiritual healing, restoring what was broken. When both parties are willing to forgive, unity and trust can be rebuilt in relationships where conflict had caused hurt and distance. God sometimes graciously takes what was meant for evil against us, using it for good purposes when there is forgiveness (Genesis 50:15-21).
Freely Forgiving Others Reflects God’s Love
When Christians forgive others freely and unconditionally, it gives a powerful witness to God’s selfless love and mercy. As Jesus taught, our willingness to forgive even enemies demonstrates radical love that serves as a light drawing people to God (Matthew 5:43-48). Forgiving others when wronged, just as God in Christ has forgiven us, is a way for Christians to reflect the transformative love and grace of Jesus to the world.
In summary, the Bible portrays forgiveness as central to the gospel message and to a believer’s walk with Christ. Just as God has fully forgiven us through Jesus’ sacrifice, Christians are called to extend lavish mercy and forgiveness to others when wronged or hurt. This reflects the nature of God Himself. Though often difficult, choosing to forgive unconditionally and from the heart brings tremendous spiritual blessings and freedom. As we are transformed by God’s forgiveness, we must make forgiving others a regular practice for the glory of God.